If you read ‘All About Me’ one of the things about my character is the organic rawness of my authenticity, experiences that makes me who I am, drives my enthusiasm to share my passion for self love, living an holistic lifestyle to enhance my well-being. I only teach, share what I am have experienced.
Subconsciously there has been a knock, a prod to write a blog, that is consistent, sharing thoughts experiences actions and reactions. Oh my dayz! When you don’t answer your knocks and prods you soon get catapulted into what you need to do…So here I am writing…your comments, likes shares will be most welcomed. My honesty, vulnerability is here on these pages, learning life’s lessons.
This is probably going to be one of my hardest, changing, metamorphosis, transformation journey, path…I don’t know where, what the end will be.
It’s happening now. I can share, show and tell when and now. Share & follow me on Instagram satyapremkaur
So here we go…I bloody hope this is short term. 🙏🏽
Situational depression is a short-term, stress-related type of depression. It can develop after you experience a traumatic event or series of events. Situational depression is a type of adjustment disorder. It can make it hard for you to adjust to your everyday life following a traumatic event. It’s also known as reactive depression.
Events that can cause situational depression include:
- problems at work or school
- death of a loved one
- relationship problems
This 3rd lockdown, has thrown me into the target of experiencing first hand how your mental health can be challenged, torn and thrown into a minefield.
The majority of my working and personal life, I have been blessed to have support and guidance even through times that have been challenging, clarity has been given to see the light and reason through the tunnel, path of life.
This blogg is going to read as scrambled, because that’s how I feel where I am at.
How did I get here? I meditate, fast, practice yoga, take cold showers, inhale and exhale…watch and manage my energy and who comes into my auric space.
I have…I thought, felt I had leveled up! During this pandemic, was living my best life.
4 months into the start of this pandemic, I was given the opportunity to use all my skills, share the benefits of holistic health and well-being and help people and get paid. The work was intense, but so satisfying, encouraging help and support to families, children, vulnerable people struggling with the pandemic, struggling with life. However this was only a temporary position. During this time, I began to explore other opportunities, different areas of employment, will the same goals to help and support that would again be rewarding.
I was ready to leave my old position, stepping into a new role, new responsibilities, into the unknown with enthusiasm, creativity and empathy, with an edge of excitement.
As time moved on…the excitement and enthusiasm began to be replaced with doubt, uncertainty with an edge of….I am still trying to find the word…But the position department, role was just not sitting well within. I began to feel I was moving into an environment of disorder, frustration, anxiety. I am not really sure again if those are the words, I fitting to describe.
I wouldn’t say, everything is a blur, but its difficult to share, write my emotions, feelings the place where I am at now as everything is in the core of my being and I am not able to move through it so easy.
I really don’t believe the characters I have been around the past month are as a result of the pandemic, their characters were as such before, the pandemic has allowed for their deep rooted dark self to reign.
I have heard of the term ‘Gas lighting’ and to be on the receiving end is really like being on a merry go round, that you’d like to get off, but everyone on it is enjoying the ride.
I am ‘Drowning, not waving’ I am in ‘Situational Depression‘
My Sunday was truly a day spent counting my blessings. I was grateful for life, for loved ones and all things bright and beautiful around me.
I began to surrender on a journey to let go of what I can’t control. I can’t control ‘Feeling physically tired’…I went back to sleep, because my mind, body and soul needed rest, needed sleep.
I practiced kindness…watered the plants, the herbs in my home, without haste. I talked to them, spent time running the water to reach a temperature not to startle, the roots. I was kind to myself, when I felt myself drifting in and out of sleep…I didn’t fight it. Instead I gathered my pillows cushions and duvet and immersed myself in a sound Bath of gongs, mantra and affirmations of love, light, healing, for love, health, protection and projection.
I listened to my heart…because it is always right.
Finally, the most blissful act of all is…To ‘Breathe’ just to ‘Breathe‘. I inhaled, slowly, deeply. Exhaled, slowly, deeply. Recognising each deep inhalation…was an emotional fight to make haste to exhale out, make haste to move on with life, with time. I gave myself permission, an invitation to… Slow my breath… releasing guilt for taking the time to just ‘Breathe’…Releasing the tension in the body, roaming thoughts of the mind. The thoughts that stop, rest, sleep, that create a tired mind, body and soul.
My Sunday “to do” List
Count My Blessings, Let go of what I can’t control, Practice Kindness, Listen to my Heart, Just Breathe.